Nottingham City Centre Crime Report: Mother Brain & Wardymon Invade Nottingham Contempoary & Junk. ADVENTURE!!

This is my good pal Mother Brain: she is a bio-mechanical space-faring psychic dinosaur overlord wot does tattoos for a living. We jetted off to Zebes in her personal Star Destroyer to visit Nottingham Contempoary.

We touched-down in Brinstar which is a cavernous area inhabited by mushrooms and a Russian hippie lady who told me I had light/white/bright-pink aura or karma or something which apparently translates to empathy, kindness, generosity, affection, imagination, and awesomeness. It also means I have a giant willy. Ladies. ^_~*

This dude paints cats. He dislikes cats rather a lot and paints them in a variety of lols-and-roffles situations, often evil, some times stoned. The cats, not the artist. Obviously. I bump in to this fellow occasionaly.

He also painted a motherfucking awesome bluebottle named Berty The Bluebottle, inspired by a dead bluebottle he found in a cereal bowl one morning. My inspirations appear to me in a similar way. Yes.

We got some milk shakes. Mine was named Alan. Alan was a vagrant minstrel who got shredded and coated in chocolate to be served in milky beverages. The girl behind the counter was, as the locals might say, "propa fit, like" and suggested that she didn't mind appearing in my blog, however I felt she may have regretted that later and so decided to snap Alan in all his murderous glory. He tasted of happy and lols.

We wound our way in to the exhibition. The weather was splendid. Admission was/is free. The whole place was packed with cute nerdettes. I pre-empted that particular dilemma though so was quite alright and able to compose myself.

The exhibition was created by Huang Yong Ping, an activist of the 1980s who fled to Paris in 1989 following the demonstrations in Tiananmen Square. Most of his work deals with politics and religion, tied in to traditional culture which is slowly being crushed under modern political and economic forces of "evil", much like ancient Chinese Imperialism of the Three Kingdoms age. Old Testament and Buddhist worship are common themes.

"Bat Project IV, 2004"

Reportedly a US spy plane which collided with a Chinese fighter yet in Chinese airspace, the accused were forced to land, all 24 crew arrested immediately. The fighter jet crashed, which caused a diplomatic incident between both nations though eventually the US were permitted to dismantle their equipment and remove it whilst the Governments tip-toed around the subject as to preserve their burgeonic economic partnership.

The hulk became a home to bats, ironically a symbol of happiness and good luck in Chinese mythology, though of course symbolic of darkness and unseen threats in Western society. The work was intended to be unveiled in 2001, however it proved to be controvertial and cause further diplomatic unrest. The collective artistic community wrote a letter of protest to Chinese, French, and US authorities.

The work eventually showcased in the US some place, though I'll be buggered hard and fast if I know where. I don't know much about America. Am often surprised at how much US geography people know . . .
YOU PROBABLY WATCH TOO MUCH TELEVISION

This is the first time this work has been exhibited in Europe, and I feel priviledged to have seen its construction first-hand by Huan Yong Ping himself just days before the visit. Might I add I feel priviledged to live in a country where civil liberties are still a common part of life. Hereditary luck and all that malarkey. Also relevant here.

I carry a n3rd calculator at all times so I can multiply my funtime lols & roffles by 87bajillion x Pi. srsly le'MAO

"Amerigo Vespucci, 2003" -- the point of which was somewhat lost on me, and I feel disgusted with myself to admit it. Something to do with the US obsession of border control, methinks ?? I am likely incorrect.

Schematics of Bat Project IV.

. . . and then there was this . . .

"La Peche, 2006"

An Angel is fishing for mythalogical creatures using seven [that is seven, not several] manifestations of Buddha with a crucified Jesus Christ for the lure. The intended catch being Leviathan, guardian of Hell's gates in the Old Testament Book of Job.

Inspired by a twelth-century illustration from "Hortus Delicarium", though the Seven Prophets were replaced with Buddha manifest. How very Zen / Harry Potter !!

At first I thought this to be a funtiems lols & roffles wendyhouse, though upon further inspection . . .

"Marche de Punya, 2007"

A slightly glib market stall, typical of backwater China: wares included incense, candles, fake bank notes offered as purity seals for wandering souls, but curiously enough also a few random household items such as brooms and other such goods.

Mass-marketing your everyday religious needs !!

Mass-producing the Deity of your choice !!

Of course, as with most things, economic prosperity does not exist without a price:

The guardian of Buddha's Temples, crushed by human ambition and desire for material wealth.

Sutured together with the hide of an altogether different beast.

They decided to give him a scrotum too.

Then I went back to this thing because it was outstandingly beautiful. Speaking of beauty I also got a faceful of panties thanks to the joys of dynamic photography. I like this place. I am coming back next week.

Did I mention the multitude of taxidermed bats ?

There were a multitude of taxidermed bats.

We concluded the day downstairs in the kiddy activity area, an attractive puma beckoned us in, and who were we to turn down such a fantastic opportunity ? Certainly not Mother Brain & Wardymong !!