Mother Brain & Wardymon Invade Nottingham Contempoary & Junk. ADVENTURE!!

This is my good pal Mother Brain: she is a bio-mechanical space-faring psychic dinosaur overlord wot does tattoos for a living. We jetted off to Zebes in her personal Star Destroyer to visit Nottingham Contempoary.

We touched-down in Brinstar which is a cavernous area inhabited by mushrooms and a Russian hippie lady who told me I had light/white/bright-pink aura or karma or something which apparently translates to empathy, kindness, generosity, affection, imagination, and awesomeness. It also means I have a giant willy. Ladies. ^_~*

This dude paints cats. He dislikes cats rather a lot and paints them in a variety of lols-and-roffles situations, often evil, some times stoned. The cats, not the artist. Obviously. I bump in to this fellow occasionaly.

He also painted a motherfucking awesome bluebottle named Berty The Bluebottle, inspired by a dead bluebottle he found in a cereal bowl one morning. My inspirations appear to me in a similar way. Yes.

We got some milk shakes. Mine was named Alan. Alan was a vagrant minstrel who got shredded and coated in chocolate to be served in milky beverages. The girl behind the counter was, as the locals might say, "propa fit, like" and suggested that she didn't mind appearing in my blog, however I felt she may have regretted that later and so decided to snap Alan in all his murderous glory. He tasted of happy and lols.

We wound our way in to the exhibition. The weather was splendid. Admission was/is free. The whole place was packed with cute nerdettes. I pre-empted that particular dilemma though so was quite alright and able to compose myself.

The exhibition was created by Huang Yong Ping, an activist of the 1980s who fled to Paris in 1989 following the demonstrations in Tiananmen Square. Most of his work deals with politics and religion, tied in to traditional culture which is slowly being crushed under modern political and economic forces of "evil", much like ancient Chinese Imperialism of the Three Kingdoms age. Old Testament and Buddhist worship are common themes.



"Bat Project IV, 2004"



Reportedly a US spy plane which collided with a Chinese fighter yet in Chinese airspace, the accused were forced to land, all 24 crew arrested immediately. The fighter jet crashed, which caused a diplomatic incident between both nations though eventually the US were permitted to dismantle their equipment and remove it whilst the Governments tip-toed around the subject as to preserve their burgeonic economic partnership. 

The hulk became a home to bats, ironically a symbol of happiness and good luck in Chinese mythology, though of course symbolic of darkness and unseen threats in Western society. The work was intended to be unveiled in 2001, however it proved to be controvertial and cause further diplomatic unrest. The collective artistic community wrote a letter of protest to Chinese, French, and US authorities.

The work eventually showcased in the US some place, though I'll be buggered hard and fast if I know where. I don't know much about America. Am often surprised at how much US geography people know . . . 
YOU PROBABLY WATCH TOO MUCH TELEVISION

This is the first time this work has been exhibited in Europe, and I feel priviledged to have seen its construction first-hand by Huan Yong Ping himself just days before the visit. Might I add I feel priviledged to live in a country where civil liberties are still a common part of life. Hereditary luck and all that malarkey. Also relevant here.

I carry a n3rd calculator at all times so I can multiply my funtime lols & roffles by 87bajillion x Pi. srsly le'MAO

"Amerigo Vespucci, 2003" -- the point of which was somewhat lost on me, and I feel disgusted with myself to admit it. Something to do with the US obsession of border control, methinks ?? I am likely incorrect.

Schematics of Bat Project IV.

. . . and then there was this . . .

"La Peche, 2006"

An Angel is fishing for mythalogical creatures using seven [that is seven, not several] manifestations of Buddha with a crucified Jesus Christ for the lure. The intended catch being Leviathan, guardian of Hell's gates in the Old Testament Book of Job.

Inspired by a twelth-century illustration from "Hortus Delicarium", though the Seven Prophets were replaced with Buddha manifest. How very Zen / Harry Potter !!

At first I thought this to be a funtiems lols & roffles wendyhouse, though upon further inspection . . .

"Marche de Punya, 2007"

A slightly glib market stall, typical of backwater China: wares included incense, candles, fake bank notes offered as purity seals for wandering souls, but curiously enough also a few random household items such as brooms and other such goods.

Mass-marketing your everyday religious needs !!

Mass-producing the Deity of your choice !!

Of course, as with most things, economic prosperity does not exist without a price:

The guardian of Buddha's Temples, crushed by human ambition and desire for material wealth.

Sutured together with the hide of an altogether different beast.

They decided to give him a scrotum too.

Then I went back to this thing because it was outstandingly beautiful. Speaking of beauty I also got a faceful of panties thanks to the joys of dynamic photography. I like this place. I am coming back next week.

Did I mention the multitude of taxidermed bats ?

There were a multitude of taxidermed bats.

We concluded the day downstairs in the kiddy activity area, an attractive puma beckoned us in, and who were we to turn down such a fantastic opportunity ? Certainly not Mother Brain & Wardymong !!

The nice art lady gave me a fistful of "the bestest crayons in the Universe". I set about creating ART.

I must admit I have a secret crush on one of the girls who organises these awesome activities. She is lovely.  

I am framing this and hanging it in Le Maison.

Mother Brain's sister popped down to say hellos too. =D

And that, as they say, is that. Christ I'm tired. Or is that Buddha .. ?

Funtiem lols & roffles in the city of Nottingham. srsly

Despite the dreary atmosphere and lack of cute spunky girls I decided to foray to Nottingham City Centre for the day to check out the new exhibition at Nottingham Contempoary [pictured].

Unfortunately the gallery is closed until Friday, though I was permitted to be nosy and take a few snaps of what the custodians were composing .

This hiatus also mean no Wednesday-noon tours so that'll have to wait until next week.

To fill the artistic void left by Wael Shawky's inability to brave English weather I got one of these cute little craft packs, complemented by suggestions on what to do with the thread & needle provided. More on this soon!

I got this very pretty book all about Voltaire, too. I am a Voltaire fangirl and junk. <3 xoxoxoxoxo le'MAO

I went in to some posh giftwrap shop which I *think* was named Paper Chase but the banner outside was hard to read. Since I'm normally a bit lost without a simple diary I decided to snap one up for a quid. The employees were repellent and loathe to serve customers. They were blatantly agitated by my presence. Cunts will be cunts I suppose.

Went to Raging Hardon for noms. Barely-adequate buffet food for a borderline-acceptable price? Get in!

They have lots of cool random stuff in the back of the venue which is cordoned off by large barriers but I snuck-in to snap some pictographs anyway. Dunno what these dolls are meant to represent so prompt research is in order!

There's always room for jelly/icecream/pineapple!

This super duper poster was displayed by the ladie's WC. I captured its soul for Unca Phil because he likes Bruce Lee a whole bunch. He probably likes that it was next to the girl's toilets too.

I gained negative-karma thanks for a small purchase from Body Shop. This was the most ethically-sound handcream I could find in there. The sheer evil burns my skin, but it is a necessary evil that shall prevent my hands transforming in to gnarly treeroots. The cute fundraisy girl was performing her usual shenannigans but I wasn't in the mood to flirt with her today.

I went in Fopp and got some entertainy stuff including a Mad Max DVD featuring the very rare original soundtrack. Most recordings of this film have an extremely shitty American dub over the top which changed the plot in places and generally sounded like fucking horse shit. Like 21st century Mel Gibson was fucking a pile of horse manure. That's how bad that was. But this is the uncut film with the original Australian soundtrack so was worth £3.

I got these CDs from there too, which I already have as vinyl by my record player doesn't work so these will plug the gap. Speaking of which, Doctor Saxophonous was playing alto sax outside M&S again and told me he wouldn 't play any Mingus because "these cunts wouldn't know what they were listening to". He didn't have a German accent though, which was a grave disappointment.

Got some grunge too. I had forgotten how proud and attractive the old buildings up near the Victoria Centre are, it's a shame more people don't appreciate what's around them. Discovered a bunch of nifty new places to visit if I ever manage to get a girlface again. I can have fun by myself though because I am fucking awesome. ^__^